an ode to kane williamson.

Usually, this would be the time to post a more or less balanced and presumably well-informed review of the series, pointing out what both teams can take out of playing these three Test matches, the pleasant surprises, the huge disappointments, the "I told you so!" awards, a look to the future and so on and so forth. 

But this time around, I just can't be bothered. And not because I've already said it all (even though I genuinely have, and you know it) or because it depresses or enrages me too much. No, I can't be bothered to review the series because for once in my cricket-supporting life I'm going to be unreasonable and happy and giddy and proud and everything in between and beyond - and all because of this boy.

(Getty Images)

I don't care about the dropped catches, nor about whether Alviro Petersen caught that cleanly or not. I don't care about the weather having been a massive disadvantage to South Africa, who would've wrapped up this series in half the time if the sun had been out more. I don't care about Smith and Amla not having been out. And even though it's hard, I also don't care about the Black Caps' abysmal bowling in the second innings, accompanied by equally abysmal captaincy by perma-stand-in-captain, Brendon McCullum.

What I care about is that Kane Williamson stood his ground; that he took being chirped at abused all day on the chin and just focused on his batting; that he got his balls smashed and his box cracked, and he still soldiered on; that he didn't allow himself to be thrown off by his batting partners departing one after the other; that he dug deep and found the character and strength in him to apply himself, to just keep going.

Not to mention that (with all due respect) this wasn't Zimbabwe or Bangladesh or even his own slightly non-threatening New Zealand bowling attack he had to deal with. This was and is the by far best bowling attack in the world, and they were hurling wicket-worthy or even lethal balls at him with almost every delivery. A bowling attack the majority of his older and more experienced team-mates were unable or unwilling to take on.

He should never have been put in the position to come in to bat and fight for a draw at 1-2 and with 76 overs left in this third and last Test match, but complaining about top-order failures seems to be the flavour of the season, so why should New Zealand's second innings have been any different? His performance showed everyone not only what is possible even against the best bowlers in the world when you just put your mind to it, it also showed everyone what he as a person and a cricketer is made of.

People who like to call themselves 'experts' were already calling for his head, they were claiming he was playing for his spot in the team after shaky performances in Australia (where only him and Reece Young failed to get runs, I know), and yet, he showed them all up. He gutsed it out like a man, like the champion and superstar in the making that he is.

Supporting a player that unconditionally, believing in him, his abilities and his character so fervently is a beautiful and at times overwhelming if not scary feeling in itself, even in times of disappointment and ducks and run-outs inflicted upon him by others. But watching him grow and succeed like this, I couldn't possibly be any prouder of him.

Maybe, just maybe, you really are the Tom Graveney to my Jonathan Smith. 

Without the brilliance on my side, of course.

mccullum knew what they were doing.

Another day of Test cricket, another New Zealand batting collapse, including another handful of delightfully thrown away wickets, another six-fer for Vernon Philander and another disappointing performance by the men in the Rembrandt suits commentary box. If I wasn't convinced that we actually are at the Basin - beautiful scenery, wind, seagulls, oh my - I could swear we've never left Hamilton.

Judging by previous posts and by what's about to come, it may sound like I hate Brendon McCullum, but it's actually quite the opposite. But I love Baz for being Baz, and not for that guy that looks like him and plays like him but still pretends to be a top-order batsman. He loves the pull-shot, fine, but so does Ricky Ponting, for example. Though unlike McCullum, Ponting not only executes it flawlessly, no, he also knows when to play it. And trailing by 338 runs in the first innings with the world's best bowler steaming in certainly isn't the right time for trying to be fancy. 

When he was dismissed for 31, after yet another start, Ian Smith said "I think Mccullum knew what they were doing, and he still did it. Because that's Brendon McCullum. Old dogs, new tricks." - that remark perfectly highlights what the problem is.

Brendon McCullum should play like Brendon McCullum, he should play aggressive shots, he should take risks, he should play his "natural game" (even though I hate that phrase), which is what he's good at. Pretending to be something he's not won't get him nor the Black Caps anywhere, and makes him look like a much worse player than what he actually is. Brendon McCullum can be Brendon McCullum all he wants, but please not at the top of the order, unless he changes something about his approach. It's not like he genuinely lacks the cricket brain, he just doesn't apply himself.

Which pretty much sums it all up, doesn't it? Application, boys, application is the magic word. Scoring 30 runs is very beautiful, and compared to me who wouldn't even score one run, it's also rather impressive, but that's not enough. They know that's not enough, yet it seems that nobody's doing anything about it, neither players nor coaches. Instead Brendon McCullum is just Brendon McCullum and Ross Taylor is just Ross Taylor and Martin Guptill is just Martin Guptill; and Kane Williamson starts to throw his wickets away now too, fishing outside off-stump, while Daniel Flynn, doomed to fail by the media prior to this match, made an almost unnoticed, certainly unpraised, hard-fought and patient opening-batsman-esque return to Test cricket - and Trent Boult is still nowhere to be seen.

Whenever a discussion about squad selections and line-ups comes up, many supporters and friends of New Zealand cricket are very quick to throw the "But, but, but - we don't have anybody else!" line at you, which by itself certainly is a valid(ish) argument. There's no denying the facts that New Zealand is a small country and that they don't have the depth of England, South Africa or Australia, let alone India or Pakistan; and they also have to deal with heavy competition for young talents from the various football codes.

But being a small country with a small talent pool shouldn't give you the right to play wild west cricket, it shouldn't give you the right to check your brain at the door and play untimely or even incompetent shots, just because of a false sense of security and the knowledge that coaches and selectors have nobody else to turn to, and it shouldn't make supporters justify said incompetence by playing the "he's the best we've got" card. Even in cricket, you can make up for a lack of technical finesse by using your brain, by learning how to defend properly, and (wait for it) by applying yourself. If anything, being part of a cricket-playing minority should make you treat representing your country with even more respect, it should make you want to hone your skills even more, and it certainly shouldn't make you throw games away just because you want to hit sixes or look good.

Regardless of the actual results, South Africa will leave the Land of the Long White Cloud feeling like winners, like they've come out well and truly on top. They thrashed New Zealand easily in Hamilton, they would've won in Dunedin had it not been for the rain  - everyone who claims otherwise, try the honesty thing I was going on about - and if the weather in Wellington had been just a bit kinder to us, we probably wouldn't have gone into a fourth day, let alone a fifth. All the awards to Vernon Philander and his team-mate, middle-order batsman Patience Application. Both had an absolute ripper of a Test series.

Best wishes to Ross Taylor for a speedy and hopefully smooth recovery.

smithy, i was doing some deep thinking last night.

So, New Zealand lost. Again. How unexpected. Not that it's not frustrating to watch at times (read: way too often), but you can only be really disappointed if you've let yourself be fooled before by a clean-sweep over - Zimbabwe. If you've enjoyed those games but remained realistic, these results against South Africa are hardly coming as a shock.

The Proteas themselves weren't exactly burning down batting fireworks on this still rather mysterious Seddon Park wicket, but you can't fault that bowling attack nor the ability of their tail to focus on putting the bad deliveries away, building valuable partnerships with the recognized batsman at the crease and scoring precious runs.

Pointing out that unstable batting was hurting NZ is giving "stating the bloody obvious" a whole new meaning, but let's roll with it. What makes absolutely no sense whatsoever though is pointing out the failures of the two openers, McCullum then practically having to face the new ball and struggling with it. If Brownlie wasn't injured, McCullum would still be opening the batting, so what exactly is the point?

He shouldn't be opening the batting, he should be batting at 6. But pushing him down the order means that Watling would have to open the batting and keep wicket, and that'd be just plain irresponsible. NZ could well afford to be a batsman short against Zimbabwe, it's an entirely different story against a world class bowling attack though.

Irrespective of conditions and opposition, New Zealand Cricket and Ross Taylor seem obsessed with the idea of playing four seamers plus Vettori - looking at the contributions from Southee in Dunedin and Arnel in Hamilton, you'd have to be stupid (or Ross Taylor) to not think that spot would've been better filled by for example Daniel Flynn.

Apart from half a spell here and there, I wasn't too impressed with the Kiwi bowlers, but wickets still fell, and runs simply have to come from somewhere. If your experienced batsmen can't be bothered to focus for long enough and things are being left to your still very young future captain (who played a very classy, very mature second innings) and your bowler of an ex-captain, maybe it's time to make a cut and bring in another batsman. Not just bringing in a fit again Brownlie for Nicol, that should be a given, but bringing in Flynn for one of the four seamers and having him open the batting.

An extra batsman won't magically turn this Black Caps side into a world class outfit, and they certainly won't beat South Africa at the Basin Reserve either, especially when they keep dropping players like Boult for no apparent reason (he did look good carrying the drinks though), but it could at least help them scrap a slightly more respectable score together and not fold like a group of super cheap cameras again.

As for South Africa, well, the 3-0 series win and the #1 mace are out of reach, thanks to the Dunedin weather, but their batting overall hasn't been up to their usual standard, and while they were never in genuine danger of losing either Test, I'm sure they'd like to put a properly dominant performance together. Oh, and Vernon Philander? Six matches, five five-fers, two ten-wicket-hauls, 45 wickets @ 13.60? Sweet as, bro.

the tale of the green top continues.

It should be a given to talk about Mark Gillespie today, right? About him taking a five-fer, about him waltzing over the South African batsmen, and about him getting New Zealand into a surprisingly excellent position before lunch.

Instead, the Black Caps being the Black Caps, I am again left complaining about yet another (though hardly surprising) batting collapse, yet another failure of the NZ top order, yet another wasted opportunity to not just make up for the disastrous first innings, but to set themselves up to even win this Test match.

Nicol was unlucky, but the dismissals of Guptill, McCullum and Taylor were all once more either poorly selected or poorly executed shots from batsmen who should know better. Williamson (42*), Vettori (0*) and van Wyk (dnb) could score some more runs and build up a bit of a lead, but New Zealand are already 4 wickets down and still trail by 3 runs.

And a day's play wouldn't be a proper day's play without me complaining about NZ media again, with them claiming that South Africa's first innings was a success for the Black Caps, because the wicket looked very easy to bat on in the morning, and South Africa were unable to get a really big score. What they all failed to acknowledge was the fact that New Zealand already had them 88-6 down at lunch. 

Regardless of the individual brilliance of a certain Abraham de Villiers, never ever should the Proteas have been allowed to bring their total up to 253. Philander's quite good with the bat, fine, but usually Morkel and Tahir are the type of players whom you feel you have to tell how to hold a bat. How and by whom were they granted 65 runs between them?

It appears as if this Test is going to be remembered rather as a batting failure parade than for great bowling. That allegedly super green wicket's browned off so quickly our heads spun (no pun intended), and while we should commend the bowlers for their efforts on a wicket that didn't offer them anything, we can only blame overall shoddy batting for the number of wickets that have fallen on this slightly hectic Day 2.

At the end of the day, you can take wickets all you want - they mean nothing if your batsmen don't score runs as well. Cricket can be so simple sometimes, can it not?

day 1 on that not-so-green-top.

That green top didn't turn out to be anyhere near as green and spicy as the players themselves, coaches, journalists and commentators as well as my most humble self expected, all thanks to a bright and sunny Wednesday in the Tron. Had there not been a thick cloud cover this morning, who knows, maybe the toss-winning captain would've been tempted to have a bat first.

While New Zealand were surely rather pleased with being only two wickets down at lunch,  looking at the state of the wicket, they should've scored more runs than the 62 they've managed to come up with. And they certainly shouldn't have lost their openers to a wide delivery a toddler would've left alone (Nicol) and to yet another fugly, dragged-on, pseudo-defence shot (Guptill).

Personally, I believe NZC would be much healthier and play much better cricket, if journalists, commentators, ex-players and current players alike, would just get out of Ross Taylor's and Brendon McCullum's backsides, and stopped praising them like God's gifts to New Zealand (or even world) cricket for basically only doing their jobs - and throwing their wickets away. 

Yes, players like Guptill and Williamson aren't the finished products just yet (and they're both well aware of that), but listening to the gentlemen Doull, Richardson and McMillan hack away at them while salivating over every single thing McCullum and Taylor did, praising accidental shots like they were of a Vivian Richards quality just because they ended up going for a boundary, is more than just infuriating. 

But then again, what do I expect of people who don't know how many runs Rahul Dravid has scored, who are unable to read a graphic telling them that Jacques Rudolph hasn't scored that many Test runs between 2006 and 2011 because he wasn't playing any Test cricket during that time, who think that because they weren't nine wickets down at lunch the Test is as good as theirs, and who call Williamson's technique "unorthodox"? 

Watching New Zealand just wouldn't feel right without a good New Zealand collapse, and the boys certainly didn't disappoint. Going from 133-2 to 133-7 and ultimately 185 all out is quite the achievement, but also shows the quality bowling attack South Africa have on display, who despite a slightly underwhelming first session, clawed their way back in and applied themselves. A foreign concept to New Zealand batsmen since 1832.

New Zealand have always accepted the fact that they effectively only have nine wickets in hand, but it remains to be seen whether they can afford a tail that long plus Chris Martin plus the absolutely bizarre dropping of Trent Boult (a left-armer more than capable with the bat, at his home ground). Not that I was expecting them to win anything during this Test series, but surely "Oldest Possible XI" isn't a viable tactic, no?

New Zealand 185, South Africa 27-2, Smith and Steyn the dismissed batsmen.

green tops are so 2011.

 

(Getty Images)

Preparing a wicket that green to suit the New Zealand bowlers, or rather to suit Doug Bracewell and his Hobart Exploits, is all fair and good, apart from the tiny hitch that it also means preparing a wicket that will suit the South African bowlers as well, who are (no disrespect) much better bowlers than anything the Black Caps have to offer.

Funnily enough, this wicket would’ve suited Tim Southee quite well. Not that I disagree with his omission, but the timing of it has been more than peculiar, as he could’ve been left out of the squad for Australia, and should’ve been left out of the squads for both the Zimbabwe Test as well as the first Test against South Africa. They’ve brought in Mark Gillespie (which I find so insulting on Southee’s behalf, I’m quite speechless) and Tarun Nethula - who could’ve been an option in Dunedin, who may be an option in Wellington, and who could now be helpful by bowling at his mates in the nets to prepare them for Imran Tahir. The thing is, Seddon Park hasn’t been too kind to spinners in recent times, and will be even unkinder to them looking at that wicket, so it’s to be expected that neither Tahir nor Nethula will play.

The Proteas will then (probably) have an all-seam attack consisting of Steyn, Philander, Morkel and de Lange plus Kallis, coached by White Lightning. Which NZ will counter with Martin, Bracewell, Boult and err - Gillespie? Yeah right. Andrew Ellis then. The bowler who bats a bit? The batsman who bowls a bit? Where the hell is James Franklin? Brent Arnel has been in good form lately, and he knows this ground inside out, so there’d definitely be a case to bring him in and take Southee’s spot, but good form in the Plunket Shield is not exactly the same as having to bowl to Smith, Petersen, Amla, Kallis, de Villiers, Rudolph. I knew this would happen, I knew some moron would be moronic enough to ask for a green(ish) top, just because it came off in Hobart against a shaken-up Australia side. If New Zealand have to bat first and the wicket doesn't brown off, this is going to be a massacre, so get the popcorn and tissues ready, kids.